Cody Musser vs Internet: Take Two!

Somewhere along the line poor Google just got the wrong idea. I had to let him down soft. I knew he was fragile, and I didn't want to give him the wrong impression. Eventually, our conversations were getting too awkward; each time we spoke I felt like he was devouring me with his eyes. Ultimately, when the tension was peaking, I blurted the first thing that came to mind ...

"I still use Yahoo! ..."

He froze. I could see that he felt betrayed, and I felt more than a little disgusted with myself. Then he told me he'd stop with the ads. I felt like I lost a friend, but at least I wouldn't have to deal with his subversive suggestions any longer.

Oh the woes of search engines and their sexual preference. I thought by all the times I searched for "(Insert slightly skanky celebrity) + topless" that they'd have caught on.