Somewhere along the line poor Google just got the wrong idea. I had to let him down soft. I knew he was fragile, and I didn't want to give him the wrong impression. Eventually, our conversations were getting too awkward; each time we spoke I felt like he was devouring me with his eyes. Ultimately, when the tension was peaking, I blurted the first thing that came to mind ...

"I still use Yahoo! ..."


He froze. I could see that he felt betrayed, and I felt more than a little disgusted with myself. Then he told me he'd stop with the ads. I felt like I lost a friend, but at least I wouldn't have to deal with his subversive suggestions any longer.

Oh the woes of search engines and their sexual preference. I thought by all the times I searched for "(Insert slightly skanky celebrity) + topless" that they'd have caught on.

11 Comments:

  1. Nix Sidhe said...
    Wait... you're not gay?
    Cody 'Zen' Musser said...
    Forgive me if the personification was confusing.

    Yes ... I'm not gay, but if I were in prison and it were only me and Google, well, I'd go there.

    Just don't tell him.
    John said...
    Yahoo Mail Beta is hot.
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